Life lessons

LIFE....LIFE...LIFE

Life is such a simple word but yet its definition is very complicated. There are so many things in life that we have to do and usually none of them are easy. When people say "Life is good!" they only refer to that point of life, not the whole life. Well, I am a 21 year old college student that knows nothing about life. I had a boyfriend since I was 18 (the starting point of my "life") till I was 21. This guy was the guy i loved so much that i had given pretty much 100% of myself to him. There were bumps on the 3 years relationship, but I just did not get awaken by them. Therefore, it ended up with a break up. Though it was tough, I actually learned a lot from it.

Well, since then, I kinda felt that I should tell my friends about it and the updates without thinking whether they care or not, whether they are friends or "friends". I knew I should have not done that, but of course I did it anyway and again, I got slapped in the face by my own move.  One of my friends actually came up to me and told me maybe I shouldn't be too trusting to people around me. Sometimes, even though they act like they care, but really, they don't. They might just be faking in order to know the insight of my story and tell everyone the opposite of what they told me.

This to me just sounds like DRAMA...and I hate drama when I am involved in it.

So, I had to let this out to someone, so I talked with one of my good old friend at home. V, my old good friend at home made me realize even more how important observing people's characteristic is. We have to use our instinct to get closer to someone and actually know whether they are the people that you wanna tell or they are the people that you wanna avoid. I feel so shallow after all this conversation and I feel that I need to build more of my personality.

I think I got into a long term relationship in such a young age that whatever we would've done won't ever work anyway. I had no principle, personality, or my own happiness in order to build a relationship.

At the age of 18, I was not the wisest person on earth. I thought that relationships were easy and it would come naturally. But, really, it requires hard work and dedication. When I think back about it, I didnt even have my life figured out yet, how could i think that I could share my life with someone else. Now that I am single and free, my best bet is to relax, back off on dating and figure out my life first before I can get in to serious dating. There are a lot of life that I get to catch up from missing it for about 3 years.

I am not saying that my ex was not a good bf. He was a great bf. really great in fact. But, I missed my life because I chose to. I chose to follow him instead of my dreams and goals. I wish him a great life ahead of him and this is my time to actually lay off and catch on with my dreams :D...

Lala